The most important part of educating a young child is knowing how to talk to him. Young children who discover the world and the importance of doing what parents ask for have another way to perceive and respond to words. You, as a parent, just need to learn to speak  appropriately with your child.

In addition, the way you talk to your child also teaches you how to talk to other people.

If you know how to talk to him and get him to work with you, you have successfully completed an important phase in your relationship.

Here are some simple but effective ways to help you find a better way to communicate with your child and to send positive educational messages:

  1. Look at your child before giving him instructions

Before giving instructions and advice on what to do and what not to do, make sure you look into your child’s eyes. Teach him how to focus on what the other one says, “I need to see your eyes.” “Please listen to what I’m telling you.” Also pay attention to body language when listening to your child. Be careful that you touch the child, but do not hold it too tightly that he realizes that you are controlling and dominating him rather than connecting with him.

 

  1. Address the child with his / her name

Start each conversation with the child by addressing it with his or her name: “Alina, please help me …”

 

  1. Use short sentences

If you want to get the child’s attention to doing something for you, you have to apply the rules of the single sentence: the more you speak, the less attention the child will pay to you. Too much information at once is a very common mistake made by parents when talking to the child about a specific task. The child has the impression that you are not sure what you want to say and therefore you are using helpful words to enforce your request.

 

  1. Use simple words

Get used to short sentences that contain words with one or two syllables. Watch small children communicate with each other. 

 

  1. Ask the child to repeat what you asked for

If it can not do that, it means it was too long or too complicated for him.

 

  1. Make an offer that your child can not refuse

You can easily motivate a 2-3 year old child, especially to avoid confrontation and anger when resisting. “Get dressed so you can play.” Give him a clear reason for your request, which benefits the child and is difficult to dismiss. This gives the child a strong motivation to give up the position of strength and do what you asked for.

 

  1. Be positive

Instead of telling him, “Do not run outside anymore,” try “we go inside, you can play there.”

 

  1. Start a request with “I want”

Instead of saying, “Get downstairs” say “I want you to come downstairs to me now”. Instead of saying, “Let Mary get in the car,” you say, “I want you to let Mary get in the car.”

 

  1. “If … then …”

“If you brush your teeth, we start reading the story.” “If you finish your homework, you can watch TV.” “If” – means that you expect obedience. You do not offer your children any alternative. Instead, “if” suggests that children experience opportunities and consequences.

 

  1. Use your feet first and then your mouth

Instead of screaming, you should go to the room where the child is. You should wait there for 2 minutes and first get the attention of the child.